Saturday 20 December 2008

Great Tackles

Some action from last Thursday's match against Atkins Rail - a suberb double tackle from Barry Gardener.

Post-match statattack #2


Thursday's game was unremarkable from a stats point of view - no milestones that I could spot. So instead, as it was the 38th and final 11-a-side match of 2008, I thought I'd review the year's footy from a purely spoddy point of view. If you want tactical analysis of the plusses and minuses (why do I think plusses needs a double 's' but minuses only needs one 's'?), of a year's worth of Accies action, you've come to the wrong place. So... Played 38, won 8, drew 4, lost 26. Those are somewhat inevitable stats if you suffer a 20-match winless run (an unwanted club record, as was the soul-destroying run of 10 consecutive defeats within it) from 28 February to 4 September. Ah well. Goals for: 65. Against: 123. Biggest win: 9-0 vs Dads Army (the club's all-time biggest victory) on 24 February. Heaviest defeat: 1-11 vs Dolphin Riders, just 2 weeks after the biggest win - we only had 10 players, mind you, and one of them was lent to us by the oppo...

2008 goalscorers:
10: Billy Monckton
7: Keith Cumberbatch
6: Simon Mesner, Andy Thornes
5: Gary White
4: Steve Spurdens, Bobby Rauchenberg, Own Goal
3: David Rudd
2: Phil Caldwell, Andrew Dade, Perre Heath, Tremayne Macdonald
1: Jason Curtis, Alex Pisano, Jon Wong, Warren Crawford, Will Pointing, Neil Burden-Brown, Charlie Purvey, Mickael Lejeune

47 different players turned out for Effra in 2008, which tells its own story: another year when injuries (to Gary White, Luis Sandoval, Billy Monckton and Simon Mesner) decimated the squad and we once again hoped for new blood. Only 29 players were used in 2007, and I for one am hoping that next year will be a return to that kind of total. Of those 47 players, 8 were lent to us by oppo teams, which shows how many times we were desperate for numbers. Ho hum. Phil Caldwell tops the 2008 appearances list, playing in 36 of the 38 matches (and he was an unused sub for one of the other two games). The first XI based on most appearances made in 2008 would have been:

Anthony, Andrew D, Neill, Dave, Stuart, Phil, Andy T, Steve, Joe, Gary H, Simon

To make up the 2008 squad of 14 on appearances alone, the bench would be Neil G, Bobby and Luke. If I were a betting man I would say two or three of this year's triallists might make that list in 2009, plus a certain Club Man Of The Year now that he's back to full fitness.

Finally, other notable stats from 2008: Billy scored our 300th 11-a-side goal in the first game of the year and scored 4 times in the 9-0 win over Dads Army, the most ever goals in a single match by one player. A 1-0 defeat by Wycliffe FC was our 100th ever losing scoreline. Myself and my little brother notched up our 150th 11-a-side appearance this year, while Andy T, Neil G and Neill each played their 50th.

That is more than enough of that!

Friday 19 December 2008

Friday Funny

Which Accie past or present does this "challenge" by Boris remind you of most?

The other side of the coin

A defeat tonight - we didn't play as well as we can, but in our defence there were some very good players missing. We lost 4-1 to Atkins Rail (actually they might be called Phoenix these days but I can't be doing with that), who aren't as good as that scoreline and weren't as good as that scoreline this evening.

Thanks go to the Skipper for filling in between the posts for the second week running; Edmund for turning out, handily back from Uni; Campbell for a second-half cameo Accies debut; and Barry for an all-too-rare and excellent stint at centre back. Elbows took Man Of The Match, solid all night in defence.

2-0 down at half-time, started well in the 2nd half but went 3-0 down, then Steve's free-kick was apparently going wide until an Atkins defender deflected it into his own net. A dubious handball against Barry meant Kevin, Atkins' veteran Gaffer, was able to seal the win from the penalty spot.

Team: Skipper, Elbows, Barry, Edmund, Werewolf (sub: Marathon Man), Perre, Steve, Club Man Of The Year, Keith, Mickael (sub: Campbell), Tremayne

The night's most magical moment was post-match in the Paxton Arms, where the 2008 highlights DVD was played on the big screen. The staff were chuffed to see pics of themselves on the night of the recent awards dinner - and I definitely heard punters in the pub talking in admiring tones when the goals of the season were on. Top marks to Elbows for putting it together - big laughs for the 'Billy's Dad' moment and the footage of our Most Improved Player.

That's all on the playing front for the year, then - it's been a pleasure, even the 20-match winless run. See you all at the AGM in 3 weeks' time - unless anyone fancies a kickabout next Thursday?

Wednesday 17 December 2008

Countdown to the 10th anniversary event #1: it's 10 months today


Welcome to the first in a series of 10 posts that will, unless it all goes bent and wobbly, appear on this site on the 17th of each month for, well, the next 10 months. Effra Academicals celebrate our 10th birthday in October 2009 and there will be a major event on Saturday 17 October 2009 to mark a decade of red'n'blue action. The festivities are now 10 months away, there will have been 10 years of Accies action by then, so each of those years will be marked on the blog.

Part 1: 1999-2000

It all began in a pub, naturally. There was a false start - earlier in '99, Ian Holmes, the man who was to become known for ever more as The Gaffer, suggested forming a 5-a-side squad and entering a league. It didn't happen that time, but it happened a few months later. At a quiz night in what was then known as the Half & Half on Streatham High Road and is now, sadly, a boarded-up ex-Jack Stamps, Ian asked myself and Luke if we fancied forming a team. Our only recent experience of footy was on the PlayStation (so-called Pixie Football), so we leapt at the chance. A few phone calls later, and Oscar, Chris, Gza and my brother Andy were immediately on board. Shortly after, the first ever Accies squad was completed - the aforementioned blokes were joined by Mick, Luis, Joe and Macca. I think there were 11 of us, crikey I hope I haven't forgotten anyone...

Naming the team was easy, as I recall - nearly all of us lived in sunny south London at the time so we wanted something that wasn't specific to Brixton, Streatham etc, but referenced the area in some way. Effra is an underground river that runs under Brixton, towards Streatham, ish. The second part of the name is after Hamilton Academical (we added the 's' by mistake and this still annoys me to this day). There was precedent for using Scottish team names: Luke, Oscar and I played park kickabout footy for Haddon Street Thistle in Middlesbrough.

Our 5-a-side exploits got off to a typically stuttering start - we were enthusiastic and some of us had talent in abundance, but we lacked any tactical nous whatsoever! Our very first game was against Woodley Wanderers, who later became Dolphin Riders and are still regular 11-a-side opponents. We lost 2-1 and our goal, perhaps fittingly was an own goal... Our second game saw us pick up our first ever point, Gza scoring in a 1-1 draw with Palace All Stars - just as well, because we lost our next 14 games in a row, most memorably losing 2-3 to Woodley in a game we had led 2-0 with less than 2 minutes to go! But on 11 November 1999 the Accies won our first ever game, trouncing Palace Cowboys 3-0. I actually missed both of those games, as I was on holiday on New Zealand with Ruth, but Hotmail emails from Oscar ensured that I commiserated the 2-3 and celebrated the 3-0 on the other side of the world! Final stats for that season were won 2, drew 2, lost 26; for 17, against 77. Gza got 6 goals, Mick scored 5, The Gaffer bagged 3, Andy got 2 and there was that own goal.

After that, in Spring 2000 and Summer 2000 we made slow but steady progress. I just found a document on my work computer entitled 'Accies email digest', which appears to be an absolute treasure trove of emails from early 2000 onwards. There's simply too much to trawl through in an attempt to include anything here, so I'll save all that for another blog post or series of blog posts! (Apart from anything else, I'm not sure how to copy and paste text from elsewhere into a blog entry, so it might entail typing stuff out from scratch!?!) But here's something from the first email I saved, dated January 2000, from The Gaffer: "It's that time again. February 3 2000 sees the start of Effra's second foray into the Elms 5-a-side League. Joe, I hope the injury has cleared up* and you will be able to join us for more of the season this time... I was in the bar at the Centre last night and the little Joe Pesci referee** was there and said that he hoped we would be back for the new season as he hadn't experienced anything quite like our victory celebrations for a long time. I think it was a compliment!"

Other 5-a-side action worth a mention includes 24 February 2000, when Oscar scored his first ever goal and promptly got 2 more in another 3-0 win over Palace Cowboys, who I distinctly recall were drunk that night - good lads. Anyway, Oscar wasn't complaining and our first ever hat-trick was scored. And on 16 March 2000, we beat our bitter rivals Surrey Envelopes (whose ranks included "Fat Gazza") 2-1 from 1-0 down, with The Gaffer equalising and Oscar getting the winner. If I had to name my favourite ever 5-a-side game, this would be it. Ask me over a pint some time and I'll talk you through it. Bloody brilliant, it was.

We also played one 11-a-side match in our first year, a 10-1 thrashing at the hands of Friends XI, who had never ever met each other before. Gza scored our consolation goal!

This post doesn't even scratch the surface of memories from our first 12 months. I urge anyone who was there back then to add their Comments to this post or, better still, post memories of your own. See you again in a month's time to relive Oct 2000 to Oct 2001...

*The knee injury had cleared up, with the aid of horse tranquilisers or summat, and Joe became a regular attendee.
**We now know him as Graham Stefford. He even played 11-a-side for us once!

Bookings now being taken!

I am in the process of filling up all the Thursdays from 15 Jan to 26 Mar with 11-a-side matches vs various oppo teams (plus a sprinkling of training sessions).  Obviously I've contacted all the usual suspects - the teams we've played before - but I'm always looking for new teams.  So if anyone knows of a team that's interested in playing the Accies, let me know ASAP, either here or via the usual channels.  Book early to avoid disappointment/first come, first served/early bird catches worm - delete cliché as applicable.

Tuesday 16 December 2008

Never offside...

...or maybe it clearly was. Have a watch of some action from last week's game against Grafton Strollers and decide for yourself.

Good luck to the Accies for this Thursday.

Up The Accies!!!

Friday 12 December 2008

Friday Funny




Here he is - the bony arsed little tyrant in, let's face it, his natural state: drunk, asleep, in a pub, collapsed.
Thanks to the Gaffer of The Paxton Arms for happily Bluetoothing this over. Next mission is to get him to Bluetooth his private collection of photos of his new bar staff...

Post-match statattack #1

Here are the fascinating facts that came to light as I updated my 'Team Selection All-Time' document this morning...

Last night's shut-out was actually our 12th ever in 190 11-a-side matches (last night I could only remember 10). They are like gold dust, and as a defender it grieves me to admit it! But the very positive news is that FIVE of those 12 clean sheets have come in 2008. Seven clean sheets in 153 games from 2001-2007, and five in 37 games in 2008 is clearly a huge step in the right direction. Should also point out that last night's was Neill Robertshaw's first clean sheet, Neill having played in goal 9 times to date. Well done, Skipper.

In other news, Keith Cumberbatch is now on 7 goals in 2008, just 3 behind Billy Monckton's golden boot-winning tally of 10.  Will Billy have to surrender the trophy if Keith scores 4 goals next week?  Keith's 7 career goals for the Accies puts him level with your reporter in the All-Time Scorers list, albeit his have been scored in nine 11-a-side games and mine were scored in hundreds of 11- and 5-a-side matches...!

Finally, Joe Sene's post-Egypt fever and next week's Spurs UEFA Cup match mean the Midfielder Of The Year will have to wait until 2009 before he notches his 100th 11-a-side appearance for the Accies. He is stuck on 99 for now.


Clambering over myself*

How enjoyable that the first Blog match result news is an Accies win.

2-0 over Grafton Strollers. Keith got the first, maintaining his almost-a-goal-a-game average, and Tremayne got the second, a strike worthy of his beloved Celtic**. And we could have scored several more. And we're in double figures for clean sheets, although that seems like damning with faint praise.

Team: Skipper, Graeme 'Werewolf' Were (sub: Keith Cumberbatch), Triple-Award-Winner, Most Improved Player, Stuart Dade, Andrew Dade, Club Man Of The Year, Andy Thornes, Mickael Lejeune (sub: Perre Heath), Tremayne Macdonald, Phil Caldwell.

Men Of The Match were the Werewolf and Luis, well deserved both!

Goodnight and Up The Accies!


*Apologies but this is an in joke that only No 10 and No 11 will laugh at... If you want to join in the fun, ask No 11 to demonstrate how to clamber over himself.
** Also an in joke.

Thursday 11 December 2008

Who will it be?


So, The Accies line up against Grafton Strollers tonight - but who will pick up tonight's Man Of The Match...? My money is on The Hut, although his attendance tonight remains a mystery...
Up The Accies!!!

Wednesday 10 December 2008

Accies Awards Dinner 2008 - Club Man Of The Year Award


There are far too many pics for me to put them all up on here but you can check them all out here assuming you're on facebook.

I thought I'd bung this one up though as after all the awards were dished out this is the one that I was most pleased about. Won by Luis Sandoval - a legend in 2008 for superb attendance, even whilst injured and not able to play.

Luis Sandoval - deserved winner of Club Man 2008: I salute you!

Tuesday 9 December 2008

It's his best side...

I was emailing a few bits and bobs to Elbows for use on his 2008 Accies highlight(s) DVD and I thought I'd fling this pic up on the blog - Dade Jr about to pull the trigger during February's win over Dads Army FC. That tricky right foot is a blur!

Sunday 7 December 2008

Sorry, Bunmi*...


...but The Paxton Arms is the finest post-match drinking establishment a club could ask for. Welcoming landlord and staff, very close to the train station for those of who have to catch the 23.01 that's really the 22.59... Long may it prosper.

*Bunmi (pron. Boomy) Phillips, long-time barman in the Bar Pitch Bar, now defunct, hence our conversion to the Paxton.

New era or another false dawn?

Welcome to the Effra Academicals blog, which I am hoping will become a busy centre for the Accies on the web. Will it be busy or will it be moribund? I am optimistic for the former, but history suggests the latter. Here's a history of the Accies on t'internet:

1. John McNally creates the first ever Accies website, featuring photos, match reports and such like. It disappears due to time constraints.
2. Stuart Dade, that's me, creates an Accies section on intheteam.com, featuring fixtures, results and other gubbins. Sadly I dropped the ball quite spectactularly when intheteam switched from being a free service to a fee-paying one, and all the info I put up was lost for ever... Ouch.
3. Gary Hutson creates http://www.theaccies.net/, still active but not, frankly, as active as anyone would like, due to a combination of time constraints and lack of contributions from club members. Still worth a look though, lots of great stuff there, and hopefully more activity in the future.
4. I create The Effra Academicals Facebook Fan Club, which started brightly and attracted members from within the club and among our Barmy Army, but is now little more than a place for (admittedly excellent) Accies-related photos and videos to live. Try this link to view/join the group: http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#/group.php?gid=4789069370
5. This blog.

So, why might this blog succeed in becoming a busy Accies e-venue where 1-4 arguably did not succeed? Well, I think that the major plus point of a blog versus, say, http://www.theaccies.net/ is that other club members will be able to add content to this blog with ease. Whether it be photos from events such as our annual awards night last week, or video footage courtesy of Elbows Caldwell, or tactical musings from Coach Mesner, or even, dare I say it, match reports - blogs are, because of the diary format, incredibly user-friendly and don't rely on one administrator to do all the work.

So, in essence, this blog will succeed if myself and my fellow Accies make it work.

Now it's over to you (and me). Several fellow Accies will receive an email invitation shortly to contribute to this blog, after which I'm hoping photos, videos, diary entries and so on will spring up pleasingly frequently. If you are an Accie, past or present, and you would like to contribute, let me know and I will happily invite you. The more the merrier!

If you want to follow this blog but not contribute, become a Follower.

Here's hoping...